Patience is a Virtue

Everyone I know doesn’t think about what they really want in life, and then they always complain about how they wish things were different. My friend who is a manager at a fast food place wishes she didn’t have to work so much so she could spend more time with her kids, but she wont search for any other work options because she feels a sense of security in her job. My friends who just apply at any and every job that is hiring, hoping to land something with a paycheck. Then they are unhappy with their work, where they spend so much of their time.

To me, it’s not worth it. I worked for a year and a half at a job I absolutely hated. I was a cashier in a small convenience store and lost so much time with my kids that I couldn’t get back. After a few years of being in abusive and controlling relationships where I also had no freedom, I have finally come to the conclusion that I am in control of my life and how I want to spend my time. So I am choosing to stay home with my kids, take a few classes at the local community college for business management (I’m only gone a few hours a day instead of full workdays) and I am planning on creating a program to help moms who are needy with cloth diapers.

My logic is that I need to create some sort of income for my children and myself (besides the unreliable child support we get), but I also think it’s important to teach my children to do what makes you happy. I don’t want them to learn that to survive in this world you have to grab the first job you find. They should know that you can be patient and do some soul searching to find what really matters to you. Even if it means you have to live a life of poverty for a little while to experience what it is like to do without all of the luxuries this modern world provides us.

Baby Dreds

Okay, my life keeps changing. Slowly and painfully it keeps evolving into something that I am proud of. I am constantly being challenged and hurt and I think I finally am seeing the light. I am being molded into this person who understands pain and suffering, but still wants to help others. I am not bitter towards life, I embrace it. I am getting to a point that if someone needs help, I will know what to do because I have been in tough situations too, and have the experience. Maybe I am wrong still, maybe that’s not why I have been put through so much suffering. But anyways, on this journey, for some reason I am drawn to a new, intriguing idea…Dredlocks.

I have no clue why all of a sudden on my quest to do good, but I saw a picture of a girl with baby dreds, and I just felt like I needed to do that too. In addition to them looking awesome, they represent to me an open mind. They are a product of love and nurturing. I always feel like my hair need to be straightened and look perfect to fit in with my peers, but if I did dreds, the pressure for my hair to look perfect would be gone. I could just focus on being myself. I could focus on what I need to do, not what I look like. I could express my creativity, instead of following the crowds. The more I think about it, the more I am thinking that I should get my comb out, a little bit of beeswax and get to work 🙂 What are your thoughts on dreds?

Life’s just not fair…

Just when everything seems to be going great, something bad always happens 😦 Well, my Ollie Bums business was coming right along, and just after I ordered my business cards, life had to throw a curveball at me. My daughters father and I had got back together late march and we had been doing well, but he is an alcoholic. Long story short, he got drunk, got violent, got arrested, and now I have a restraining order on him. So now I feel like I am starting over AGAIN. I know I should be more focused on my business, but writing has always been a great emotional outlet for me and I think maybe I should start working it back into my daily schedule. Has anyone here ever entered a writing contest? What did you think about it?

Can’t Sleep!

All  of yesterday I was researching everything I could, because I really want to turn Ollie Bums into a business. And the more I read about it, the more complicated it gets. There’s all the little details and everything is interwoven. I feel like if I don’t do things in the correct order, it could mess everything up. But with all that being said, I really don’t mind it. I am having fun learning how I can set up my own web page, what kind of business license I need, getting the certs for the fabric I use to make sure they are approved and safe to use as clothing/cloth diapers, etc…The feeling I get while doing my research is about the same as when I am reading a good book. New details keep emerging, every little detail is important. Just when I think I know what is going to happen, another twists sends me wandering off in another direction looking for more answers.

Well, anyways, now I can’t sleep. All I want to do is research more. I feel like the end results I want are so far away, but I can’t get any closer if I don’t try and keep plugging away. I know I wont have time for a nap either because tomorrow is going to be a laundry/sewing day. I got maybe 4 hours of sleep. Oh well. Sleep is overrated, right? lol

Today I am pretty excited about the whole cloth diaper thing. I have finished making a few diapers and they look really professional. I posted some pictures on FB and I have people lined up to buy these things. And that was just on the chat group, not even in the selling group. I asked on there how to use paypal and figure out shipping and there were ladies giving me all sorts of great advice. I think tomorrow I am going to make a trip to the fabric store for some more material, walmart to buy some envelopes to ship my diapers in, and home to start selling 🙂 Right now I think I need to buy some more snaps. Off to Amazon I go!

Well since we have slowed down on the coop again I am focusing on my cloth diaper business. Okay, so it’s not exactly a business yet, but it is the start of one. Today I will be cutting out pieces like crazy and then this evening I am going to sew them all together. I need to figure out how many I want to give away as testers so that I can get some feedback from the public. I’m not thrilled to give them away, but in the long run it could be a great thing for my business. I have a great feeling about this.

I also need to start working on creating a new pattern to improve the diapers I already have. I am excited about trying new things and coming up with some innovative ideas. Cloth diapering is already great, but I want to find a new spin on it. I won’t ramble on today because I need to get to work, but I’ll try to post pics of what  I come up with 🙂

Ollie Bums

Last Night I finally completed my first Ollie Bum Fitted Diaper. I have one other done and all week I will be working to make as many more as possible. Then the beginning of next month I am going to be meeting a lady who wants to look at them. If she likes them we may try to work out a deal so that she can sell them in her shop. I am excited to see my business slowly come to life 🙂 I have a good feeling about Ollie Bums

Hemingway

I am truely amazed at what excites me as I get older. My baby girl learning how to wave or take a step. Getting to read my book for longer than 10 minutes uninterupted. Backyard chickens and cloth diapers….my older daughters learning to tell time or master a new skill. And getting my love to read a book. Okay, so he hasn’t actually read it yet, but he did ask me to check one out from the library from him. Amazing to me since all I have ever seen him read is guitar tabs.

So I was at the library and was trying to think of something my love would like to read. The first thing that came to mind was Hemingway. I have never personally read any of his books, but I have heard the name enough that it sounded like a good fit. Also I watched a movie with Owen Wilson in it where he goes to Paris and goes back in time. Somehow he ends up meeting Ernest Hemingway and I loved his character. It portrayed Hemingway’s personality is a bit brash, but there is something about the way his mind works that intrigues me. He has one of those minds that I wish I could just hang out with him for a day so I could nit-pick his brain.

Does it make me a nerd that I am so excited about the possibility of my hunny reading a book? I can just imagine him all kicked back and relaxed, holding up a worn copy of Hemingway’s The Sun Also Rises, and his attention focused upon the words printed on brittle, yellowing pages. It would make me want to buy him a cigar and put him in a wingback leather chair in a home library filled with the aroma of old books. Dark wood everywhere and an old vintage lamp with one of those emerald green shades just for reading sitting on a large wooden desk. Debussy wafting through the air. The gentle melody of Clair De Lune filling the senses and…  Hold up. I am going to stop here because I just realized this is never going to happen, lol.

Random thought before I go to bed. My favorite childhood fairytale was Beauty and the Beast. Looking back it had nothing to do with the love story, and everything to do with the fact that the beast gave her a library. I guess Belle was the only princess I identified with because she understood what is so magical about getting lost in a story.

As an adult I have less time for myself to get lost in the minds of great authors. But as the kids get older I have been able to find little morsels of quiet solitude where I have rekindled my passion for reading. At this point in my life, what excites me is the fact that my family may actually share this interest with me. There is nothing better than a good book.

Head in the Clouds

I think it’s been about 15 days since my last post. I planned on writing daily, but you know how that goes, lol. I guess you could say that I’ve been busy, but that wouldn’t be entirely accurate. I’ll admit I have just been lazy. I have too many things going on at once and I tend to slack off a lot until I can manage to get myself back on schedule.

 

What have I been doing all this time you ask? Well, taking care of the kids is always my first priority. My love and I have also started watching movies almost every night thanks to the convenience of Redbox. And when I should be working on my chicken coop, or sewing diapers, I instead have been daydreaming. I know…not very productive. But dreaming to me is a lazy way of planning.

 

What am I planning? A trip to Paris someday, a homerun business so that I can spend all the time with my family, owning a home and enjoying simple daily routines. I watch shows where people travel and do all of the things I want to do and I have come to realize that my dreams are possible. Maybe not today, tomorrow, or even next year, but if I have a goal and always keep it in mind, I can make conscious daily decisions that move me a step closer.

 

There is a quote that I love. I’m not sure who said it, but always remember to shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you will land among the stars. 🙂